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My friend Allison was adamant about this one. She wasn't going to choose a method which would result in a shocking site for the person who found her. So shooting was out, and pills weren't a great idea either because you might throw up and choke on your vomit and that would be upsetting for the finder. She also made plans for who would find her. It shouldn't be a close relative or a lover -- they would be traumatized. Better to be found by the mailman or a neighbor. And certainly not a child; something like that could mark them for life. It didn't strike us as contradictory to spend so much time worrying about the effect finding the body would have on our survivors and yet be willing to inflict the far greater pain of the death itself on them. We were always sure we had a right to end our lives; that right at times seemed the most important human right there was. However scripting the finding of the body is ultimately a way of trying to live on beyond your death. The pain of existence is removed but your spirit is still alive, as the director who plans all the events. Thus it was imperative to plan one's funeral in great detail as well. |